Now I know what you’re thinking. Why pay for LADY LARA’S expensive services when you can flub a burglary and get ‘em for free? Not to worry. His bill will be a hefty one. The FROSTY-HEARTED SEAMSTRIX is only too happy to stitch up his Derrick with a thimbleful of needles and make him show some true reMorse. All the better to appreciate his a capella wailing! And the beat goes on! A nice row of clothes pegs on his squishy sacks evokes musical magic. By the time the NAUGHTY LAUNDRESS finishes hanging the pink pussy up to dry, he could teach Johnny Rotten a tune or two. La de da de da! With razor-sharp fingernails on his milkless mams, THE ADEPT VOCALATRIX coaxes a blood-curdling High C from HER wailing Don Burglovanni. Time to train up his breathing technique. Love to smoth you, baby! To take him to an even higher note, the technically competent ELECTROCUTIONATRIX cranks up the juice and conducts the good news to every last quarter of his inchy skin flute. That’ll give the larcenous lurcher something to yodel about to the folks back home. Just goes to show, crime doesn’t always pay – not even in the Palace of Sin.
